A Christmas Story Desktop Leg Lamp

November 17, 2013

What is a lamp, you nincompoop? It’s a Major Award.

Back in the day, we were the kids that wanted to shoot our eyes out with a Red Ryder carbine-action, 200-shot, range model air rifle with a compass in the stock. We were the ones that endured the humiliation of having to wear the pink bunny suit (or ugly Christmas sweater, or hand-me-down neon snowsuit). And yes, despite knowing full well what would happen, we stuck our tongues to the pole.

But now, we’re the grown-ups. We’re the ones weaving a tapestry of obscenities, working in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. And those of us who are homeowners probably wouldn’t mind a new furnace for Christmas. But you know what would be GREAT? A leg lamp. Oh, look at that! Will you look at that? Isn’t that glorious? It’s… it’s… it’s indescribably beautiful!

Available now HERE for $50.

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